Real Talk Rant: Why Road Trips are the Worst

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Ah, road trips.

Expectation: In your mind you think “this is going to be great”, put the top down of the convertible, pop on some tunes and let the breeze instagrammably blow your hair in the wind. WRONNNNGGGG

Reality is: you planned this trip way too last minute and flights are way too expensive, or your destination is just close enough to drive to but not far enough to fly to…. or if we want to be super annoying…you and your S/O are being cute and driving across the country hitting up all the famous Diner’s and Drives restaurants. ::insert eye roll emoji:: aka I’m Jealous. HA, Don’t get me wrong, I do love a road trip when you’re not in a rush, the scenery is pretty and you aren’t alone, then you can at least play car games and talk along the way!

In the last two months I have done two smaller road trips (SF –> LA and Houston –> Dallas) and since you have all the time in the world to ponder about life, I took notice to some of the most annoying parts of road trips that I thought I would share with you:

  1. TRUCKS. They slow us down, swerve and why the HECK do they feel the need to pass each other? Is this some sick game truck drivers play with each other? All you’re doing is cutting the rest of us off and slowing down all the people actual using the fast lane to…well, GO FAST! Stay in your lane, k thanks.
  2. Gas prices are RIDIC. I get it, we’re out in the middle of nofuck no where and we are desperate for fuel…but come on…rude, just rude.
  3. When your radio station changes to another language. And no my car doesn’t have satellite or anything fancy so it’s just me and my radio. Go ahead, judge me.
  4. The amount of bugs smashed on your car. Car wash anyone?
  5. When your butt sticks to the leather seats and falls asleep. Stretching your legs is crucial and I should probably start wearing leggings or sitting on a towel for comfort sake.
  6. The amount of crap you end up eating. What is it about being in a car that makes you want McDonald’s breakfast and sour candy…and have no shame sitting and eating it in your car?
  7. Cell service goes in and out. Don’t you dare fuck with me. Don’t you do it.
  8. The one time you have allllll the time in the world to call your mom, dad, aunt, cousins and friends you barely ever talk to, no one picks up the phone. WHYYYYY.
  9. Other drivers. Just when you put your cruise control on and are in the fast lane at a comfortable 85mph, you look in your rearview mirror and see someone about to run you down. Just chillllll, I’ll move over just give me a second. Sheesh.
  10. Worst part of road trips? Knowing you have to drive back home.

Moral of the story for me is I need to listen to more podcasts, get a new auxiliary cord and pack a cooler with snacks for my next road trip. Also, I’m officially calling these posts Real Talk Rants, so welcome to the first official one!

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Travel Diaries: The Worst Parts of Being on an Airplane

Hey fwendz! Sorry I’ve been MIA — been SO busy and traveling a ton, but I’m baackkkk and have a bunch of fun posts coming soon. Speaking of traveling I’ve been experiencing a lot of the same shit over and over so wanted to share some realness about being on an airplane.

SO, we all know traveling is a bitch. The whole process: packing, ubering to the airport, going through security, spending $75 on a glass of wine at the airport…but today I’m going to focus on the actual act of flying and discussing the shit — the very annoying, uncomfortable and WTF shit — that actually happens on an airplane.

I’ve experienced literally everything on this list, but please share any other ridiculousness in the  comments that you’ve dealt with while on a plane!

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  1. Finding out your seat buddies are a smelly old man and a crying baby. NOoooOOoo
  2. When you have to get up to go to the bathroom and have to pass people in the aisle and rub butts. Like, is this considered our first date? Do you want my phone number?
  3. Your seat doesn’t recline and you’re on a 6 hour flight.
  4. You sit next to the airplane police and tells you you shouldn’t put your jacket in the overhead. (This JUST happened to me last week. MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS and LET ME LIVE)
  5. Your seat mate keeps hogging the armrest and you start playing a bitchy game of MOVE YOUR ELBLOW.
  6. You have an ideal row 4 window seat and a family of 18 asks you to switch with them so they can “all be together”. NOPE. I DON’T CARE. I GLADLY ACCEPT TITLE OF BIGGEST BITCH ON THE PLANE.
  7. You sit in the vicinity of a farter. RIP
  8. You’re on a business trip and have to work on the plane but there is not enough space on your tray to fit your computer so you are working hunched in a little ball.
  9. The person diagonal from you won’t shut their window and it is GLARING into your eyeballs.
  10. Someone pukes and the whole plane smells making you want to puke.
  11. When they bake fresh cookies for first class…and you’re definitely not in first class. RUDE
  12. The food. Nuff said. (although I do have to say Virgin’s cheese plate is aiite)
  13. You haven’t showered in two days and you sit next to a cute guy. That would happen to me.
  14. You’re watching a movie and a sex scene comes on and you feel like everyone is judging you. AGAIN, LET ME LIVE
  15. When you land, and are trying to get off the plane someone behind you doesn’t let you go first. ISN’T IT COMMON KNOWLEDGE YOU DEPLANE IN ORDER. STEP BACK BRO

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Happy flying! 😂

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Travel Diaries: Miami

WASSUP BEACHESSS!!

For those of you who follow my craziness on social media, you probably saw I was in Miami week…and lucky for me it was a work trip that turned into a play trip. I mean, I’m to the point in my life that if I’m traveling for work, you bettah believe I’m staying an extra day to enjoy. No kids, no man, no problem! Also, it was 85 degrees in Miami sooooo how could I not have stayed?! The pool was just calling my whiter-than-white legs to be there.

OOTD DEETS
Skirt: Scored from Adiel’s Boutique on  Poshmark // TopShoes & Earrings: Asos // Lipstick: NYX Cosmetics – Pink Lust

Let’s start with the #WERK, though: If you have been a follower of mine from the Poshmark early days (if you didn’t know, I have been working at Poshmark for FIVE years!), you know I used to plan live events across the country that we traveled to to meet and connect with our community members and while we took a little break, we are BACK on the #PoshNation tour again. I mean, we have some seriously inspiring Seller Stylists in our community building empires, creating brands, and just overall using the app in ways we always dreamed about. So when we get to meet face to face and hear their stories first hand — ISSS A DREAAM. I usually want to cry because I’m so verklempt (this is the yiddish word for overwhelmed with emotion) with these women (and men!).

So we kicked off the trip getting ready for Poshmark’s #PoshNation Miami event on Thursday night and it was SO AMAZING to meet all the local Miami Seller Stylists. I rocked a very Miami outfit – white, neons, and tassels. We had drankkss, hit up the Photo Booth, took SO many selfies and had an unforgettable evening. I hope if I come to your city you come out to meet us!

On to the PLAY portion of the trip: For work we stayed at The Surfcomber which was sold out (it was boat week so finding a room was challenging even for one night) but my girl and I found The Nautilus hotel on Hotel Tonight. It was overpriced but super cute – exactly what you would picture for a South Beach hotel: palm trees inside, marble tables, tufted beds and a Alice in Wonderland style pool – so quirky, fun and chic!

After we checked in we napped, got ready and went to Mango’s — a SUPER touristy bar with impersonators, neon lights, chippendale style performers and overpriced drinks (are we sensing a theme in Miami, fuck it’s expensive!). Mango’s was a HUGE bar, they had different rooms with different style music, black lights, and since it’s a huge tourist spot, it gets crowded which was fun!

After Mangos? 3am pizza delivered to the hotel…DUH!

Our last day was spent by the pool, eating BLTs and drinking prosecco. We also found out our flight was delayed but gave not one fuck because that just meant more pool time for us. YOLO. Ok, I need to stop staying that. Really. Our last stop was oysters and peel-n-shrimp at the Ritz because, YOLO. DAMNIT.

Overall Miami, you really brought the heat and my whiteness is a little more glowing…but still white. Oh well. If you have any questions about what else I did or ate or wore, let me know!

XO, bitches…I mean, beaches. 😜

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