Yes, this is part one…because let’s face it, there will be many in this series. And you may be thinking that the title is aggressive. But, let’s face it online dating is freaking aggressive…and sad, and confusing and ugh so many things. I mean, who REALLY wants to be judged on a handful of photos and a short bio to see if you are a compatible match with someone. I don’t WANT to but it’s practically our only choice now a days.
So, what’s the big problem? Well just to start, no matter how cute of photos you post, or how witty and smart you sound in your dating profile, you will get discouraged, feel like you’ll be alone forever and definitely get the occasional (and by occasional I mean frequent) horn dogs sending a “hey beautiful, the things I would do to u” or “letz meet and fuk” over a thoughtful and respectful first message. I’m not even kidding, this has happened more times than I can count. Can you not?
I always think…is that really how you would everrrrr go up to a girl. NO.
To that my feelings are this:
Notice the folder name? I did not do that for blog purposes either – it has been properly titled “Dating aka HELL” for over a year now.
So without further adieu, here are just 15 of the many reasons why online dating SUCKS:
- There are far too many apps…and all are filled with the same shitty people
- They trick you into paying for a subscription to see who likes you, or who messaged you, or who winked at you or who super liked you- whatever happened to love don’t cost a thing?
- You’ll end up talking to someone for weeks before being able to make a date…or not
- Which brings me to this point. YOU WASTE SO MUCH TIME
- Get hopeful over nothing…
- When you write a message and then they read it and don’t respond you really feel good about yourself
- Too many notifications on your phone, don’t we have enough social media to keep up with?
- Douchebags. Enough Said.
- Men are horrible at selecting photos, KEEP YOUR SHIRT ON AND DON’T POST A GROUP PHOTO AS YOUR PROFILE PIC
- They say they are looking for something real…but I think most mean “real, quick”
- You go out and they make you pay
- No, I’m not just looking for a hook up
- Everyone always think there is something better out there — this isn’t a restaurant where you get to see what the catch of the day is
- You WILL see an ex bf or someone you know pop up and then you have to screenshot it and pretend you never saw it
- If you do actually find someone and your friends ask how you met, you will forever have to say “TINDER” #romantic
Soon I’ll tell you about why dating sucks particularly in the bay area….that will be a good one. Lastly, of course I am forever optimistic, hopeful and always looking on the bright side AKA that most of this makes a damn good story.
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Ahhh, adult life. For some it never begins (lucky sons of bitches) but for the rest of us out there that aren’t still supported by our families, got lucky and landed a reality tv show and is now selling fit tea on Instagram, or founded an app and sold it for 5324 katrillion dollars…WE HAVE TO ACTUALLY TAKE CARE OF OURSELVES. UGH
Throughout my ’20s I learned how to support myself, be independent, and quite frankly #getshitdone, however there are always all the adulting things you HAVE to, things you probably shouldn’t do, and then the things you never do. I wanted to share my list with you all.
Let me know if you have any others to add to the list, I want to know what your #adulting struggles are!
Things You Have To Do
Make enough money to pay that rent
Take care of yourself when you’re sick
Do face masks and consider botox monthly
Go to work everyday
Renew car registration and move to a new townhouse…in the same month
Clean, laundry, go to the doctor, call your grandparents, socialize
Not laugh when someone says PENIS
Take photos of your food — yes this is a must
Things You Do But Probably Shouldn’t (but who’s to judge)
Watch reality tv over the news — who really wants to watch the news now-a-days though #DEPRESSING
Order Postmates twice a week…or twice in a day when you’re hungover
Use the pretty filter on Snapchat
Drink a whole bottle of wine to yourself
Spend the night with a guy you just met
Get road rage a curse the SHIT out of the person who cut you off
Eat dinner standing up
Eat pizza that was left out all night
Go to sleep and then wake up at 1am and go get a snack
Things You Never Do
Yoga — that shit does not relax me
Travel the world (because of the rent in the above category)
Say no to brunch
Be sober for more than 5 days
Leave Target without spending at least $200
Lie. HAHAH JK
Can’t we go back to high school when you have literally nothing to worry about? PLEASE!?
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Welcome to #MyRealLife! I almost feel like I’m filling out a dating profile on OKCupid or Tinder, like “Hi, I’m Amanda and I’m funny, love my dog, from the Bay Area, love wine and am always smiling.” Boring and awkward much? Justttt a wittttle.
For those that don’t know me, WASSSUPPPP!! I’m stoked to kick off this new venture where we can talk more in depth about all the ups and downs of being newly 30, single, broke, and honestly, fucking happy! But really you guys – for those who already follow me, you probably know a lot about me because I have #NOFILTER and am always truly trying to keep it real. I love giving you the raw, unedited, unfiltered view of my life so get ready for a wild, wine-filled ride.
Why did I start this new blog? Well, I used to have a personal style blog and loved sharing my daily looks, but there is so much more to me now then just fashion. Don’t get me wrong, there will be a big style and beauty presence here but I want to get #deeper and share more than just what I’m wearing. Life is amazing but is also #HARD and not always as pretty as our Instagram photos make it out to be, so I’m here to keep it real no matter what the topic. I’m going to share every aspect of my life including but not limited to:
- Dating (and why it is the worst thing ever)
- Cooking healthy (or trying to)
- Fashion & beauty (because we gotta look fly AF)
- Adulting and how to attempt to save money (keyword: ATTEMPT)
- Entertaining and making a damn good cocktail (or how to remedy those hangovers)
- Social Media & Poshmark marketing tips (because this is my day job and I got some good 411)
And overall how to stay positive and keep smiling through the good, the bad and the effing ugly.
So let’s get this party started…because if there if one thing you should know about me – I love a party! Who got the wine?! 😉 Me, obvi.
If you want to take our relationship to the next level (let’s get serious, shall we?) Follow me on the internetzzzz aka social media!
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